Bruce was airlifted to Pittsburgh and had surgery to correct a 99% blockage in his carotid artery. He was stabilized and moved to a room in the CCU. He was settled into his room by the morning of 4/28.
Soon, Bruce’s mother and sister and nieces and nephews started coming in. Every one of them was quickly slapped in the face with the new reality. His brothers had to travel to get home. Bruce was comfortably asleep in the CCU. Bruce was on life support. He had a breathing tube. Every sort of monitor was attached to him.
If anyone reading this has never has seen someone in this situation, only one word can describe it. SAD. It is simply sad. I was sad for Bruce. I was sad for me. I was sad for Bruce. I was sad for his mom. I was sad for his siblings. Mostly though, I was sad for our kids. It was all around unbelievably sad.
There was nothing to do except to sit and wait and look and hope. I will say that both Bruce and I have multiple siblings and I think somewhere in the neighborhood of 30 nieces and nephews, along with, at that point, a half of dozen great nieces and nephews. This was now Saturday. As many of our friends heard, they too were trickling in.
At some point, I remember looking around the community waiting room and realizing that the room was overflowing with people who cared about our family. The other families of patients in similar situations were in an extension of the waiting room.
The plan? Unknown. My biggest heartache? Still waiting to get Chris there. He was, at this point, taking flights from LA to Pittsburgh. He was to arrive early Sunday morning. His cousin Donivan was picking him up at the airport. Chris was, as far as I recall, unaware of the absolute situation.
I need to interject that my 3 kids were 26,24, and 21. They have always had an unbelievable support group. They were fortunate in their lives not only to have numerous cousins that they grew up with, but also an extended family. By now friends were scattered around the country.
Because we were in the hospital and Chris was on an airplane as the news of Bruce was spreading, the access to us was difficult at times. One of their friends said that if I would update him, he would manage the many concerned friends to keep everyone posted.
Bruce was in the CCU. It was hard to see Greg and Meg’s heart being slowly broken. It was even more difficult to see his mom’s heart being crushed. She sat to the right side of him. She talked to him. She sang to him. She tried to play peek-a-boo with him.
She had lost her first husband from cancer several years earlier. She had lost her 3rd oldest grandson in the 80’s to a drunk driver. Unfortunately, she knew the pain. Unfortunately, we were all feeling the pain. Sadly, nothing could change the reality of the situation that was unfolding.
Obviously, the doctors and nurses were doing anything they could for Bruce and quite honestly for us.
By Saturday afternoon, which was 4/29th, Bruce’s 3 brothers were home. Two of them lived out of the state.
Here’s something that I struggled with. Bruce and I were separated. I was legally responsible for him. I, first of all, knew that I was not really responsible for decisions. The family as a whole was. Whenever a doctor was in or requested a meeting I always had one of his brother’s with me and one of our kids with me.
There mostly was nothing more to do than sit and wait. We would go to the cafeteria and grab a bite to eat. Bruce’s mom just sat in her seat looking at her baby. The kids and I weren’t leaving other than to get a shower and a couple of hours of sleep at a hotel down the street from the hotel.
The Parke family are somewhat a comical group of people. Because this was the week of the professional football draft, occasionally someone would turn on the television in the room. At some point, Bruce’s mom would see that the television was turned on and ask why. Ron, Bruce’s brother would look at his mom and tell her that Bruce wanted to see it. There would be a quick chuckle, then back to the vigilant watch for some indication of life.
That pretty much sums up April 28th and 29th, 2006.
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