Friends.

We all have friends.  Some people like friends in quantities, others cherish and value their close group of friends.  There are no limits or rules with friends.  Some people seem to go through cycles with their friends, based on where they are at in life or what they need.  Again, friends don’t come with rules.

The important thing about friends is cherishing them for what they bring to the table.  In turn, you always should be aware of what you give them in return. It has to be a mutual relationship.  But, just like in a marriage or any relationship, there is always an ebb and flow. 

We all know either a friend or someone who has a friend who sucks life out of you.  You know the friend that you look at your phone, see who it is and wonder if you have the ability to emotionally talk to them. 

They make you tired just talking to them.  Debby downers.  The only purpose for their call is to gossip, ask questions and complain.  They tell you nothing that is pertinent in your life.  It’s a complete waste of time and totally unnecessary.  At what point in time did we get to this point? 

I remember being a teenager and I would always wait for my mom to be talking to her friend, Marilyn on the phone.  They would sit and chat about nothing and everything for an hour, maybe two. I realize they were simply entertaining one another.  I would use their conversation to my favor.  If I wanted to go someplace or use the car, I would quietly walk in the room and in as quiet of a voice as I could get, I would ask to take the car or ask if I could go someplace.  As soon as she said, “mmmhmmm”, I would say thanks and be out the door.  It worked every time. 

In the end, I knew that I would be allowed to go to the mall or to take the car, whether I asked in a loud voice or quiet voice.  What my mom was more interested in was spending time with her friend on the phone.  They weren’t the suck life out of each other friends.  They were true friends who worked together, supported each other through divorce and death. 

My sons have a number of friends who when they reached high school became interchangeable.  These guys would call the house and just ask for Chris or Greg.  Never one over the other.  Now, my sons are 36 and 34, and these guys are still friends.  We have vacationed with them all.  They all treat my daughter as their own personal little sister.  Most of them were at her wedding.  These guys all flew home for my kid’s dad’s funeral.  That is just a testament to what a good group of guys these are.

Friends are necessary for all of us.  Old friends, new friends, renewed old friends.  That is actually the best part of Facebook to me.  It’s not the ability to look at abused animals, or sad situations. Rather the ability to find old friends and simply see what they are up to and where life has taken them. 

Call or message an old friend and just say hi.